warning: this post might be too sad for you. or it might be funny. either way i am drunk.

first of all i may or may not feel like this:

kindergarten=iran

 

i woke up this morning at 7:00.

went into fiona's room to wake her.

but i didn't wanna.

i wanted a tornado.

an earthquake.

a time machine.

i knew i would be faced instead with a lip and a face.

"i don't want to go to kindergarten mommy".

her little bangs all straight and serious.

i assured her that linny, tuck and ming ming went to school, as did olivia, her cousin wyatt, dora and all the others too.

she smiled.

it worked.

so off she went for 8 hours.

 

but what about me?

there are no other little ones at home to tend to.

but there is painting to do.

and i should probably get all the dishes done and dust....stuff.

i could read all the design blogs i love that i need to catch up on..

but i don't wanna.  i am not interested in design right now.

instead i read THIS

this is tragic.

this is LOSS.

this is unspeakable.

if you don't know the back story i'll tell you.

this woman lost her son to suicide a few months ago.

go ahead-

for me...read it.

for you, read it.

when you're done come back....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

so what about me?

i am going to go to fiona's school and i am going to grab her up and scoop her up and eat her up.

bc i can.

 

 

we are dark..

 

Remember me when I am gone away,

Gone far away into the silent land;

When you can no more hold me by the hand,

Nor I half turn to go, yet turning stay.

Remember me when no more day by day

You tell me of our future that you plann'd:

Only remember me; you understand

It will be late to counsel then or pray.

Yet if you should forget me for a while

And afterwards remember, do not grieve:

For if the darkness and corruption leave

A vestige of the thoughts that once I had,

Better by far you should forget and smile

Than that you should remember and be sad.

*christina rossetti


thank you marija stephens.

god be with your family.