things that need to quit it...

 

those windows, wall color, color palette, furnitu

everything.

 

 

same room.

not in love with the coffee tables but they work in the space.

i am in love with the purple painted bookcases.

QUIT IT, ROOM!

 

 

that tile needs to quit it.

 

 

that rug needs to quit it.

 

 

those walls need to quit it.

 

 

diane kruger's hair needs to quit it.

 

no words.

Q.I.

 

 

hello kitty ancestral portraits?

yes. quit.

 

 

chair sex.

stop.

also fireplace...you stop too.

 

 

cease and desist, arch.

 

those are orders.

 

getting hair cut today.

probably like diane kruger's.

 

 

 

if this makes you puke then i did my job. if not then you must have your own house of poop to deal with.

everyone says their husband's shit smells the worst in the universe.

but i am here to tell you that nothing compares to the assfire of rotten dead animal with diarrhea on top 

that comes out of mike's butthole. 

 

and the worst part is his toilet is close to where i work and where my nose is.

so i am literally sitting in a cloud of gag inducing shitvomit smell for at least 45 minutes...

the smell is slow to dissipate, hilariously!!!!!

 

and i don't give a shit if you're eating.

i don't care if this is too much for your senses.

deal with it.

i have to.

 

while you sit in your glorious smell-free cubicle of life please know that in order to bring you the prettiest

pictures i can find i have to endure the smell of a 1000 dead bodies covered in dead body diarrhea with diarrhea butt sauce.

every single GD morning.

 

 

here you go..

just mah summer house..

 

 

just the tub in mah summer house..

 

 

just mah winter house..

 

 

enter.. throw your shit (gently) on my platner..

 

we meet through there for chestnut roasting and congnac sipping around 8:00..

 

 

casual fireside dinners every night..

need a basket?  i got you covered..

 

 

feel like readin a book?

this is my favorite spot.

 

 

this is where i sleep.

don't worry you get pratesi linens too...

 

 

your cozy sleeping quarters..

mary and baby jesus got yer back.

 

 

marble encrusted tub for your bathing needs.

 

just don't go in after mike.

 

 

 

done looking **now with updates..

 this is it..

the world's most awesome kitchen.

 

close up of awesome bits:

it's perfectly sized.

not too big not too small.

is that the fridge with those brass handles?

bananarama.

the floor.

the fireplace.

the symmetry those windows are giving me.

the brass kickplates/baseboards whatever you call it..

the skylight.

it's all so good.

OH! and look at the dishwasher handle!

she/they obviously had shit custom fitted..

 

i love it. 

don't you?

 

here's more house..

 

i give it 4 house hearts. 

(the highest you can get is 5)

 

 

***updates- the cabinets are from ikea. the unlacquered brass hardware was found in vintage shops and on ebay 

 

after you leave a comment telling me how many house hearts you give this house..

go over to LA MAISON BOHEME and see my guest post on what my outside world would look like if money were no object.

there is a poop tree!

actually it's a brownie tree but it looks like a poop tree. 

plus it's little charlie's birthday and he just had brain surgery.

but he's home and doing great!

CLICK HERE.

 

 

images via canadian house and home

eye treats

 

i love everything going on here..

 

 

moroccan!

 

 

(i am deeply concerned by the armadillo lion dog in the fish tank too)

but the rest is so glowy and serene.

 

 

mmmmmmmm...

 

 

 

 

those leather klismos chairs are so good.

 

i love the warm coppery brown hues with that bright green tile.

pretty pretty pretty.

 

i hope you all have a glorious weekend filled with wine, weed and meth!

no. not meth.

 

just happy times.

and maybe some xanax.

 

i love you.

images via world of interiors