sorry for the delay my people.
these recaps take time and i got no time sometimes.
word.
so..
this week is just chock full of terrible design and sad, ugly surprises.
but then i guess every week is isn't it?
starting with the release of my beloved cathy out to pasture...
look closely..
don't cry cathy.
this time the turds have to design a wedding reception in 2 days.
The Bride:
contradiction.
The Groom:
this spells divorce.
once again cathy is on her high horse and begins spouting off all of her wedding design credentials:
3 weddings not including her own plus the wedding design distinction of wedding design wedding emmy.
president of weddings
cathy persuades forces everyone to let her be in charge of the bride and groom table..
and then she licks her salt rock.
karl, kevin and mark are in charge of the not victorian gentleman's lounge..
karl thinks it's dumb to have a disjointed mid century style lounge area at a victorian themed wedding.
duh. it is.
but the bride wanted an orange and yellow victorian glamour shots room,
and the groom likes skateboards and crooners.
so there's that obstacle.
if it were me i wouldn't have taken what they wanted so literally.
i would have nodded and been like...mmhhmm...skateboards..cool...ohh...uhh huh...orange and yellow..mmhmm....colors..
then i would have made a real pretty wedding reception and dina manzo's brain would have exploded into a thousand tiny, gay wedding planners and they all would have hi'fived me.
anway..
kevin don't care..
he's just excited that he can do more 50's kitsch and mark just wants to build something out of skateboards.
depsite his best efforts to creep everyone out..
karl says fuck this shit..i'm gonna go ruin a flower arrangement.
mark sketches out some dumb skateboard hanging ladder of stupidness..
victorian skateboard ladder.
of stupidness.
lord bromstuff shows up for the camera challenges..
these camera challenges are just getting way outta hand...
leslie has a stroke...
meg poops her pants...
and then it's back to making everything look more terrible..
meg makes flower trophies..
how many times did that shit get knocked over?
answer: 1000
kellie makes a giant orange victorian spider...
scary.
leslie draped some fabric over a table and lit a candle..
i will cut her some slack since that was probably all she could manage with her new stroke arm.
and
karl proved that you can make flowers look ugly..
the turds cut it close time wise bc of all the table setting and shit clearing.
there is stampeding..
careful meg. don't knock over the flower arrangements. or everything else.
time for judging..
dina manzo is beside herself with disgust.
this shit would never happen at the brownstone.
the winner this week was mark with his lighting smarts and skateboard ladder building...
turning asian.
asian head bow of gratitude.
the loser is cathy with her weak bride and groom table..
whatever..it's not worse than that lame asian skateboard ladder.
or the prom meet and greet table that leslie fashioned out of an indain sari.
cathy straight up left bc no one liked her.
end of story.
well, and there was no way anyone could have looked into those giant orbs for too long without feeling extremely uncomfortable.
